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 Applicant - Krixus - Level 80 Orc Rogue

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Krixus

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Number of posts : 3
Age : 28
Localisation : Marietta, GA
Registration date : 2009-05-19

PostSubject: Applicant - Krixus - Level 80 Orc Rogue   Tue May 19, 2009 12:14 pm

Last night after your Ulduar run, I tried to talk to Starsong about my interest in the guild. Unfortunately, my aDSL decided to act very mean and say “No soup for you”, cutting me off from my internets no matter how many times I tried to reset the modem and router.

Since most of you are probably going to learn this story one way or the other, I figure the best way to apply would be to explain why I’m interested in the guild and why I’m planning to leave my old one.

*clears throat* Gather ‘round children for my tale in decent of Warcraft and where it has led me. This tale begins in the June of 2006.

I was 16, just fresh out of my wisdom teeth surgery. I was miserable with the sores and pain of dealing with eating nothing but Carnation Instant Breakfast. I quite honestly had nothing to do. So, my parents gave me a gift: a copy of World of Warcraft.

I started playing a Tauren warrior on the Thrall server. A few days later I found the guild which I eventually played to 60 with. I made a few close friends and managed to play up through Upper Blackrock Spire and part of Zul’Gurub. It was fun, but then real life came knocking on my door around February 2007, when my junior year of high school proved too stressful for even me to manage. I had to drop the game for a time.

During my absence, the guild I was a part of was literally split in half due to greed and conflicts of interest. I didn’t care much for the guild relations after I had dropped the game, but I knew that much through my closer friends.

A year passed. It was June of 2008. A friend of mine had recently acquired Warcraft and its expansion and loved it to death. He then invited me to play with him. At first I was skeptical. I had been “clean” for nearly a year. Did I really want to go back?

Sure enough, I ended up popping in a time card and rolled another warrior on Dragonblight, the server he played (and currently plays) on. Over time, I realized that I wanted to play my characters from Thrall here. I had found a new home, and quite possibly a new guild. After consideration, I transferred my original Tauren warrior main and my rogue alternate. I tried playing the warrior once again through Burning Crusade, and found that it had changed so much, I wasn’t able to enjoy it anymore. Then I turned to the rogue and remembered the fun I had leveling him to 50 pre Burning Crusade. True, I didn’t get to 60, but that didn’t stop me from being curious. I went back to playing the rogue, and eventually I switched mains. Krixus, the orc rogue, was now my main character as he has been to this day.

A few days after I transferred the characters, I was invited to the guild <with Pancakes> due to the relationship with my friend. I wasn’t 70 by then, but at the time that didn’t matter to me. I just wanted to find that same feeling I got from the old guild I had in Thrall. …minus the whole splitting in half part obviously. For a time, this was what I got. I managed to meet a lot of people who helped me and were nice to me. Overtime their focus shifted more to raiding, and eventually I joined their ranks as one of their raiders.

Raiding Kara, playing in TK and SSC, it was a lot of fun. But as we got into the 25 man business, it was evident there was a lack of players to surf through the content. This in turn caused tension in the guild. Eventually, it began shifting its direction to a more serious raiding guild. At first I was a bit hesitant, but rolled with it. It wasn’t terribly serious. It was simply “just be on time.” But even then, not enough people were showing up or on time. Guild leaders and members were frustrated and annoyed, and it was equally frustrating to hear people get angry at each other for things outside of their control for the time.

All the meanwhile, I was starting college as a music major. My classmates would normally find me sitting in the main room with my laptop right under the Wi-Fi access point playing WoW during my free time. Many of which assumed I was going to drop out of college (I didn’t, just to clarify). Obviously, the strain of college is one thing, but the strain of being a music major in voice was a bit much for me to handle. Trying to juggle the raiding times with my chorus, practice, regular homework, and listening was difficult to manage, but I did it. I planned out my days and did all that fancy stuff to make it work.
But the guild continued to slide into a more serious raiding mindset, and it became taxing on me and a good real-life friend of mine who was also in the guild. And then…

A week before Wrath of the Lich King was due, we decided to do one last Black Temple run. Unfortunately, we only had about seventeen people geared in kara and partial gruul/tk/mag/ssc gear. My friend and I were waiting when his two dogs began to fight. OF course, he intervened and stopped the fight but damaged his hand in the process. So when he said “Dogs fought, hand hurt, got to go,” The raid leader made a snide comment akin to saying that if it were him, he’d shoot the dogs.

Now, on the outside, this doesn’t seem like a big deal, and I can understand why my guild mates don’t exactly understand why my friend and I reacted so strongly to this. But the reason was, he was threatened by his father only a few days ago that he would put down his dog. The dog he had wanted ever since he was a kid and the dog that had a fight with his sister’s dog. For the both of us, this was only the trigger for the powderkeg of school that made us quit for a time. We left suddenly, without too much warning.

Eventually, six months later, I started getting urges to play WoW again. I was still in college, much to the surprise of my classmates, and finished off the semester on the Dean’s List. Then in April, I was diagnosed with Type 2 Diabetes. For me, this wasn’t (and isn’t) a terrible thing, but I knew I needed a distraction to keep me away from the ice cream, so to speak. So, I saw WoW, and I came back.

Of course, I was reinvited to the guild. They had missed me to an extent, but I had noticed it had changed significantly. It was no longer a casual raiding guild. It had become something which I’ve coined as a“Casual-hardcore-raiding-community”. They have the guild social aspect while having the “serious business” raiding aspect. So it was yet another ten levels (which went fairly quickly mind you) of gameplay to go play with the “big boys”. I hit 80 nearly two weeks ago, but during the time I leveled, I kept feeling a sort of “detatched” feel with most of the guildies. Sure, there were a few guildmates that sincerely missed me and helped me out in terms of running heroics, killing through group quests, and the so forth. But even still, that uncomfortable feeling of “I should not belong here” persisted.

I figured it was simply because I wanted to raid. Which was true. I figured that was the reason why I felt so weird in the guild. So, I applied for raiding membership and was accepted.

The way it works is that new raiders of an initiation period where they must complete three full raids raids before being accepted as a full time raider. Now, this isn’t so bad, but the fact is the guild has become so hardcore and competitive for spots. I checked the raid last night, and only three initiates were in that raid. And considering there was an over flux or rogues (at least in my opinion), my chances of getting into raiding status again are slim to none.

That was when it hit me like a freight train: I’m in this guild for the loot and not the guild. THAT was why I felt like crap every time I logged in. THAT was why I felt guilty whenever someone helped me. It’s a terrible thing and it makes me want to gag, because I’ve essentially become what I never ever, EVER want to be EVER.
Originally, I was in it for the people, but now I feel like I’m a misplaced cog just wanting more grease when I’m not even part of the system. It’s a terrible feeling. I don’t’ want to be a Loot Crazed Looney like those infernal stealthed mobs in Borean Tundra that COME OUT OF BLOODY NOWHERE while I’m picking a goldclover.

So, you’re probably asking, why would you want a selfish jerk like me then? The reason is simple: I don’t WANT to be in it for the loot. It just so happens that’s the reason why I’m still clinging to the guild like a lamprey eel. The people certainly aren’t save for a few close friends. But that’s it.

And that’s why I’m at your doorstep, because you happen to have a simple little phrase in that little introductory paragraph in the forums: “We are a friendly guild that functions more like a family than a high-end guild.” <with Pancakes> has evolved into the opposite, and I want no part in it. Not if it means I end up acting like a greedy fool.

The only complicated part is leaving my current guild on a good note. They HAVE done a lot for me, and I don’t want this to seem like “OK, bye guys I’m doing my own thing, thanks for the help.” But at the same time, I don’t want to overstay my place there either.

I plan to leave tonight after talking with the guild leaders and explaining everything. This will happen whether or not I’m accepted in this guild or not, because I cannot in good conscience stay in <with Pancakes>.

I want to have that feeling of “belonging” again instead of what I’m feeling now.
Thank you for your consideration,

-K

TL;DR version: My guild is turning me into a loot obsessed dwit, and I’ve lost the feeling of being a part of something. Please save me.
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Ollock
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Number of posts : 59
Age : 31
Localisation : Everett, MA
Registration date : 2006-10-05

PostSubject: Well.   Tue May 19, 2009 3:26 pm

Thank you for your application. I read your entire post and i totally see what you are getting at. I will be on in game today so please feel free to contact one of the officers or myself.

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Registration date : 2006-10-17

PostSubject: ACCEPTED!   Tue May 19, 2009 11:20 pm

Thanks for the app we will look forward to your rank here as you grace us with your pressence if myself and olly isnt on you can contact starsong or Klonoaprower for an invite stating that me and olly (ollock sry thats what we call him) for an invite you surprisingly will be the only active rogue online due to a fall out here but anywho i dont wanna write 4x as much as you did Razz so i'll see you in teh roster hopefully soon

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